If only children came with an instruction manual.
Parenting is no easy task. That's a given. Our children come into this world a unique individual and we just have to wing it. They come with no model handbook detailing their personalities, their likes or dislikes, or that offers a solution to every problem that could arise. Here's the deal: You raise your children the best you know how and assume they'll grow up to have the same morals and values as you. After all, you raised them, right? At least that's how I was, but to my dismay, my children grew up having only 'some of my values' and many ideas and beliefs completely apart from what I'd tried to instill in them up until that point.
My children did not grow up around drugs or that type of environment, but that is the path they chose. One of the most difficult things a parent will ever do is watch their child destroy everything good in their life, abandon their dreams, forsake their own children, and chase after that which could end their life without a moments notice. Indeed, it is one of the most heartbreaking things a parent will ever have to face! I can tell you firsthand it's more than difficult!
I'd told each of my children that 'in the end' they would be alright, but it was up to them where they'd take themselves between then and when all was well with their world. God gives us our own free will so we're able to make decisions for ourselves. He very well could have made us worship Him, but then, wouldn't we be resentful? Sure, we mess up and we do so miserably, but 'in the end', we're able to look back and see just how He never left our side. For that one reason, I'm ever so thankful! The thing about having our own free will is we bring upon ourselves consequences that we'd really rather not have to face, but that we have to endure. Not only do we bring things upon ourselves, but we drag every member of our family through it, right along with us. Only if the wisdom we've gained from our years of experience could save our children from going in the wrong direction! Alas, they must learn on their own. So, as parents, what do we do? We pray and we pray!
The stress that comes from watching your child struggle with an addiction can take such a toll on you. Several years ago, one of my daughters was arrested for having a meth lab. I received a call at work and the person asked if I'd heard from her, which I hadn't. So, they proceeded to tell me I might want to go online and look at the local news. Completely unaware she'd been arrested, I brought up a web page to one of our most informative news stations around and right before my eyes was a picture of my daughter. Now, when you're from a small town, your first thought is one of extreme embarrassment, for I just knew everyone would know she was my daughter! I was devastated, to say the least! A thousand emotions flooded my mind. I couldn't work. I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. For two weeks, my mind was in a frenzy, not knowing which way to turn. I could barely drag myself out of bed. The stress I'd endured for five long years watching my child go down the path of destruction had been massive and almost more than I could bear.
This is but a brief synopsis on being a parent with a child on drugs, and actually, I've had three children who chose drugs over everything else. Many times, I felt so alone. No one could possibly identify with what I was going through, or so I thought. I realized, though, that there are many parents out there that are in the same place who also feel alone, vulnerable, and desperate to have someone who understands what they're going through. If you're this person, follow me in the days ahead as I delve deeper into the life of a parent with children on drugs. Identify with the pain, the shattered dreams, and the heartbreak. Learn how it is that I am able to remain focused on 'the end' rather than the here and now.
My children did not grow up around drugs or that type of environment, but that is the path they chose. One of the most difficult things a parent will ever do is watch their child destroy everything good in their life, abandon their dreams, forsake their own children, and chase after that which could end their life without a moments notice. Indeed, it is one of the most heartbreaking things a parent will ever have to face! I can tell you firsthand it's more than difficult!
I'd told each of my children that 'in the end' they would be alright, but it was up to them where they'd take themselves between then and when all was well with their world. God gives us our own free will so we're able to make decisions for ourselves. He very well could have made us worship Him, but then, wouldn't we be resentful? Sure, we mess up and we do so miserably, but 'in the end', we're able to look back and see just how He never left our side. For that one reason, I'm ever so thankful! The thing about having our own free will is we bring upon ourselves consequences that we'd really rather not have to face, but that we have to endure. Not only do we bring things upon ourselves, but we drag every member of our family through it, right along with us. Only if the wisdom we've gained from our years of experience could save our children from going in the wrong direction! Alas, they must learn on their own. So, as parents, what do we do? We pray and we pray!
The stress that comes from watching your child struggle with an addiction can take such a toll on you. Several years ago, one of my daughters was arrested for having a meth lab. I received a call at work and the person asked if I'd heard from her, which I hadn't. So, they proceeded to tell me I might want to go online and look at the local news. Completely unaware she'd been arrested, I brought up a web page to one of our most informative news stations around and right before my eyes was a picture of my daughter. Now, when you're from a small town, your first thought is one of extreme embarrassment, for I just knew everyone would know she was my daughter! I was devastated, to say the least! A thousand emotions flooded my mind. I couldn't work. I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. For two weeks, my mind was in a frenzy, not knowing which way to turn. I could barely drag myself out of bed. The stress I'd endured for five long years watching my child go down the path of destruction had been massive and almost more than I could bear.
This is but a brief synopsis on being a parent with a child on drugs, and actually, I've had three children who chose drugs over everything else. Many times, I felt so alone. No one could possibly identify with what I was going through, or so I thought. I realized, though, that there are many parents out there that are in the same place who also feel alone, vulnerable, and desperate to have someone who understands what they're going through. If you're this person, follow me in the days ahead as I delve deeper into the life of a parent with children on drugs. Identify with the pain, the shattered dreams, and the heartbreak. Learn how it is that I am able to remain focused on 'the end' rather than the here and now.
Comments
Post a Comment